Before diving into my journey, let’s acknowledge a common misconception: the belief that experimenting with cannabis is harmless. This notion often stems from a lack of awareness about its potential risks, including addiction and even psychosis. Like many others, I once held this view until it was shattered by my own experiences.
When I found myself diagnosed with cannabis-induced psychosis (CIP), it was a revelation that sent shivers down my spine and sparked deep contemplation about my life choices. My every decision, every mistake, suddenly seemed under intense scrutiny. Did I truly deserve this? It was a question not just for me but also for my loved ones.
Reflecting on my journey, I realized that inadequate research before consuming cannabis was a significant misstep. My aim isn’t to instill fear but rather to inform others about the potential dangers. I’m part of initiatives like the Cannabis and Mental Health project and the Cannabis and Psychosis project because I believe in educating youth about these risks.
My own descent into CIP started gradually. Initially, I consumed cannabis infrequently, but as circumstances shifted, so did my usage. University life in Canada, coupled with the isolation of the COVID-19 pandemic, led to a sharp increase in consumption. Soon, I found myself waking up still under the influence and perpetuating the cycle by smoking more. This relentless pattern ultimately triggered my psychosis.
I began experiencing disturbing delusions, from believing I could communicate with birds to paranoid fantasies about unrelated figures pursuing me. Signs and symbols took on sinister meanings, feeding into a spiral of irrational thoughts. I convinced myself that others could read my mind, rendering verbal communication obsolete. It was a profoundly dark chapter of my life.
Fortunately, with the support of medication, counselling, and my family, I managed to navigate through this ordeal. Abstaining from cannabis was crucial, along with prioritizing physical and mental well-being through exercise and a balanced diet.
I understand the allure of cannabis, whether as a means of escapism, sensory exploration, or social acceptance. But I implore anyone considering its use to delay their decision and seek reliable information, and make informed decisions. My journey serves as a cautionary tale, urging others to tread carefully and prioritize their health and clarity of mind above all else.
Kalpit Sharma
Strategic Advisor,
Cannabis and Mental Health
June 2024
